I bought the jumpsuit at Streetammo and heels in a Jette Riis store in Denmark ..
Lots of you have asked me what my bedtime routine is, so I’m gonna tell you step by step… I do not use any facial masks cause my skin is very sensitive to chemicals and I haven’t found any good natural ones. A little tip: I wash my face 3-4 times a day with a mild soap and rinse with warm water, I follow with a quick cold water splash. Warm water will open the pores of your skin, it will expose your face to build up of bacteria. Water is really important, so your skin don’t get dehydrated and get breakouts and dry skin.
1) I put my hair in a bun. ♡ 2) I remove my makeup. ♡ 3) I wash my face with warm water, 2 times and dry it with a towel. ♡ 4) I brush my teeth and floss them. ♡ 5) If I haven’t already, I shower. ♡ 6) I use a natural lotion for my body. ♡ 7) I jump in my pajamas. ♡ 8) I turn on some candles and listen to relaxing instrumental music. ♡ 9) And last but not least, I check my twitter and instagram for 5-10 minutes, blow out my candles and fall asleep.
ZzzzzZzzzZzz what’s your bedtime routine?
Everything is from H&M besides the bag, it’s from Ebay.
The other day I was walking to the bus stop, I realized it was the first time in 4 months I took the bus. I just always drive in our car or take a cab. I was standing there with my headphones in, flashbacks just ran in over and over again. One little bus stop could make me think like that. I was amazed, I was scared. I thought of when I was a little girl and I would stand there in the cold and wait for the bus, I thought of how sad I was every morning. I could feel the emotions I had back then. I always knew it was back to another day as a victim for the bully’s. I thought of the 3 years I was stalked by a pedophile. I remembered his face. I remembered everything. I remembered it was that bus stop I saw him the first time. Fie, 10 years old who never knew that taking that little bag of candy would give her 3 years of being followed, stalked and mind tortured. I didn’t understand it back then. All I knew was that for 3 years my life changed. Police meetings, always being followed around, protected and had cameras on the house. Sometimes I think… What if he had got to me? What if my parents hadn’t protected me like that? Would I have been raped? Tortured? Killed? Would I be here today? Now that I’m older, I got to know about the man. He was sick, he had a dark past and I was lucky to be protected like I was. I was lucky enough to be here today.
My mind was always on being safe and on the bullying in school. I always felt like I didn’t belong. I remember thinking.. Why does all of this happen to me? Am I not supposed to be here? I remember the pain inside me, it wouldn’t stop till the day I found a way to make the pain disappear for a while. I sat on my bed, it was past midnight and tears was streaming down my face. I took a blade and I cut my wrist. One little cut, turned to more. It hurted, but it let me relieve all of those feelings. It’s a stupid way to cope with things, but.. it just happened. I was letting emotional pain out through physical pain. I remember that first sting when I first sliced the blade over my skin. My heart was speeding up when I saw the blood, because I knew I did something wrong. That bright red line… Like a highway route on a map that you want to follow to see where it leads. I did. I felt relieved. Reality kicked in, I grabbed some toilet paper and pressed hard against the cut. I felt my embarrassment, like a backbeat underneath my pulse. That relief there was one minute ago disappeared and turned into a kick in the stomach. People would ask me.. Why are you always wearing long sleeves? It was my way to hide my evidence of my weakness. That night, turned to more. I got addicted.
“It get’s better”, haven’t you heard that a million times? You feel like it’s just words, right? So did I. My thoughts was… How will it get better? You are just saying that to give me hope. My mom took me out of school and had me homeschooling when my depression took over. I lost my self. Who was I? I didn’t know. It seemed like everyone had a life going. Sports, friends, hobby’s and good grades. How was I supposed to have hope? I was lost. Lost in my own thoughts. I was the ugly, chubby girl who cutted, starved and had attempted. The only friend I had, let me down.. She told everyone what I was going through, why I got out of school. More to make fun of. I only had my family. They were my only source of happiness. I was home for a year. I was only surrounded with people who wanted me the best. I started to find my self. I was singing, dancing, drawing… And smiling. I won the battle. I sat my self a goal. I wanted to be pretty, I wanted to change and fight for a bright future. I wanted to learn and embrace the talents I was born with. Instead of hating myself, I found out what I was good at. What my talents were. I found out how much I had to show the world… It’s years later and here I am. A whole new person. A happier person. I run one of Scandinavia’s biggest blogs, I sing, I dance, I write, I draw.. I work as a advertiser, designer, blogger, model, event-manager, makeup-artist/stylist, photographer and nail technician. Who would ever think I would get to where I am today? My parents would. The ones who pushed me in the right direction. The ones who supported me and believed in me. I learned so much. These years have made me grow as a human. I’m here to tell you. Chin up love. The words “Things will get better” doesn’t work if you don’t fight the battle. Don’t sit there and wait. Collect all your blades, flush them out in the toilet. Plan your day. Work out, it will make you feel like you are alive. It will give you energy. What do you love to do? Do it. Get better at it. What’s your dream? Fight for it. Nothing is impossible. I promise you, it will get better if you just fight for it. I believe in you.